The Heavy Side of Healing - Part I

Healing is liberating but it can sometimes feel heavy.

Here’s a few things no one tells you about the healing journey -

1. It’s a journey, not a destination. The point of healing yourself is to evolve, expand, learn the tools, build character, embody and integrate the wisdom, strengthen your resolve and eventually be able to help others. It tears you down and rebuilds you. It happens in cycles, like waves on the ocean crashing over and over, ebbing and flowing, sometimes it’s calm and sometimes a force to reckon with. These moments and experiences make us resilient. But that’s not pretty, is it? Healing can potentially be just as painful as what happened to us. But reminds us just how powerful we actually are.

2. The more you heal, the more haters you get. When you are working on yourself, and you start hitting your stride, sometimes (not always) you will trigger those around you who are refusing to do the work. Or maybe their healing journey has a different approach than yours. Whatever the case, people who have found some level of peace can inadvertently attract people who don’t and will do things to diminish yours. You have to get good at ignoring and not taking anything personally. It’s the same with gaining success, being on a health journey, anything even remotely positive in your life. Which leads me to the next one….

3. You find out who your people are. When you are actively working on yourself, you might notice that some people have left your life, or maybe now that you’re “better” those who abandoned you at your lowest might be coming back in. But healing has this way of weeding the wrong people out of your life. You learn to get comfortable letting go although it is still never going to be easy. There are some exceptions - some folks may lack the capacity to deal, don’t know how to heal themselves, or maybe they don’t have the same resources you do - and that can make some people feel inadequate. We give grace to them. But it brings up my next point -

4. You learn how necessary boundaries are. If you’re the type of person who is uncomfortable with enforcing boundaries (as I was at one time), you have to get over it at some point. Repeat after me: I am not a bad person for having boundaries. The more you practice enforcing your boundaries the easier it gets. You don’t mind speaking up or out, not necessarily making a scene but letting people know you mean business. If you don’t have those respected, that person or people need to be removed until they can either respect your boundaries or they need to exit stage left for good. There’s a difference between toxic people and people who are simply unaware/naive. Know the difference.

   A. An example of enforcing a boundary looks like, “No.” or “I’m not currently in a position to be present for XYZ, thank you for respecting my boundary on this.” “I need you to leave now, we will speak another time.” or “I appreciate you understanding my position on this.” It may sound low key like corporate-speak, but not assigning alot of emotion is usually the best course of action. Direct, clear, no hesitation, confident.

5. The little things become the big things. Healing doesn’t happen overnight, it doesn’t always come in huge miraculous dramatic ways. It happens as the result of consistent, daily efforts and the willingness to change. Small changes add up over time. There will be subtle signs that everything you’re doing is making a difference. The true test of healing is when you’re faced with your next challenge. You don’t have to ace it - but take the small wins when they come. Take accountability, honor your progress no matter how “small” it seems and know that’s how you know your effort matters. Which brings me to -

6. Use the tools in your toolkit. There is so much information out there nowadays about ways to regulate your nervous system, breathwork, mediation, binural beats, sound healing and music, reiki, plant medicine, retreats, classes, books, therapist, hypnosis - if it were that easy, we’d all be healed, right? Healing is not a one size fits all situation. And the tools we use may change over time. It’s important to trust your intuition. There’s no harm in trying things, and there’s no harm in simplifying what you’re doing. But it all starts with you. You have to use your tools, even if they don’t seem to “work” at first. We have this sense of urgency that we need to heal as fast as possible that we forget that good things take time. You’re BUILDING LASTING STABILITY not a feel good house of cards. Don’t put your healing on a timeline. Many of the recommendations I give my clients are intuitively led for them specifically but also I recommend what has worked for me personally in my own journey, I suggest things because I feel like it might provide some extra assistance. You never know where it might lead to.

7. Everything is energy. Doctors have practiced for years under the misconception that our bodies are compartmentalized. This part of your body is unwell, lets only focus on that. They only treat the physical symptoms. Therapists study the mind and psychological aspects, they tend to intellectualize the issue. As an energetic practitioner I can tell you that regardless of the issue - IT IS ALL ENERGY. We are emotional, energetic beings, too. I’m NOT in any way suggesting that you not go to your therapist or physician, but there may be other things happening in your energy field that are causing on going issues. Look at all sides when it comes to your healing! I have been able to pinpoint diagnoses with no prior knowledge of conditions solely based off a person’s energy field and where it originated, getting to the root of the problem. I can see old injuries and trapped emotions, cords of attachment, past life trauma and how it’s affecting them now. Don’t be afraid to let your energy speak to you.

I will share another post in the soon because I feel like there is so much more I could share! This is not a post to discourage anyone from healing, in fact just the opposite, this is a reminder that you are a divine light and deserve to repair and replenish what was lost. Sending you all so much love!